" Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her,
'Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.'" -Proverbs
It is safe to say that I gave my
Mom a good deal of trouble when I was growing up. I was the child who never
could find her shoes. The one who would borrow things from my mother’s arsenal
of craft supplies and never return them. I would complain about what she had
made for dinner. Daily. Especially if it
was healthy. It should give my Mom great comfort to watch me try to parent
Genevieve Olding who can’t ever find her shoes, constantly uses my things
without returning them, and is disappointed with every dinner, unless it
involves a processed chicken product.
The
older I get the more I discover about how patient, compassionate, and
intelligent my Mom is. I would like to take all of the credit for helping her
develop a good amount of that patience, but I had three siblings who
contributed to the process. We would imitate her voice when we were children,
mockingly squealing “Wait until your father gets home.” or “Who took my good scissors.” Now that I am the mom I understand more about
the nature of such comments like these. Motherhood is exasperating and my Mom
made it look easy. She would iron the pleats in our school uniforms, cut the
crusts off of our sandwiches before she packed them, and was NEVER late picking
us up from anything. You would not get the
same report about me from my children.
My Mom had it together.
I
learned more about her compassion as I moved into my college years and beyond.
I was so incredibly homesick during my freshman year at Miami and my Mom knew
it, not because I told her, but because of who she is. This was before texting, social media, and
email, so what my Mom did required a lot of effort and organization. She wrote
me letters. A lot of letters. Some letters just described what she had done
that day, some were funny, some were serious. All were cherished. Each time I
opened my mail box in Dodds Hall my Mom was there. Her letter writing got me
through my freshman year of Miami. My Mom has gotten me through a lot of things
I didn’t think I could survive. The power of my Mom’s presence in a crisis is
more potent than anything a doctor could prescribe. When I first found out I
was pregnant there were several perilous days where the doctor told me he did
not think the pregnancy was sustainable. Basically, he told me that I was in
the process of miscarrying. I was completely devastated. Then my Mom showed up.
She sat next to me on my couch for three days. She told me we would wait
together. We waited and we prayed. We talked and cried and laughed. In the
midst of gut-wrenching uncertainty, my Mom provided stability. SHE saved me,
and to her credit she saved Grace too, because I wouldn’t have survived that
week without her.
My
parents are successful people. It took me a while to realize it, but my Mom is
the brains behind that operation. She is one of the most intelligent people I
know, but she hardly ever takes credit. Even when my Dad tried to give her
credit, she will change the subject. I
often wonder how she imparted some of the lessons she did. There was little
discussion about education in my house growing up, but there was no question
about how important it was. How did she do that? There wasn’t preaching about
the importance of going to mass, but you knew better than to miss it. As an
adult, one of the things I am most impressed with is how my Mom raised her
children to be so independent. My sisters and I are all fiercely independent
women. We have different opinions about almost everything and we aren’t afraid
to share them. My brother can hold his own when we are all together. No matter how different the opinions or how
much our ideas contrast, all four of us realize that our relationship trumps
anything else. We understand the gift we have in each other. My Mom did that.
Happy Birthday, Mom. I will never be able to adequately
express how much your life has meant to mine, but I promise I will never take
your good scissors again.
I love you.
